Mary Slew
by LilyHellsing
Summary: What if a Mary Sue character comes into the book of CDF and tries to make everything go "right"? While every guy falls for her and her huge balloon like breasts, she tries to "save" everyone. Humor and stupidity!
1. Chapter 1

**I was looking in the mirror, thinking about perfection, when I suddenly thought, "MARY SUE! No…Mary Slew!" XD Get it? So here's my idea…**

**A perfect girl gets herself into the series of Cirque Du Freak and tries to "Save" everyone. She knows the series and tries to make everything "perfect". Of course humor is definitely in it. With all these guys falling for her, and her being very book smart (while having the perfect model body)…it'll be interesting.**

**This is NOT my normal type of writing so please bear with me. I'll post the prologue first and see how many people like the idea. Here's the prologue!**

* * *

"I'm so bored…" Darren muttered as he and his best friend walked through the school yard. He was kicking a soccer ball ideally, annoyed that no one wanted to play. Half the people who usually played were busy with homework, some were flirting with the opposite (or same) sex, and the rest were at home, sick.

Steve smirked, looking over at the sibling friend of his. "Let's play by ourselves then!"

They stated to play on a small field, the goals a few good yards away. Darren slipped as he tried to steal the ball away; Steve quickly faked a left and went right, so he fell on his butt. Just as Steve was about to make the goal, a girl about their age blocked it with ease, sending it on the other side of the school yard.

She wore blue jeans that hugged her wide hips and thin legs. Her shirt, which seemed to be more of a sports bra than shirt, covered her rather large (and seemingly fake) breasts that bounced as she stood still. Her hair was bright blond and fluffy as hell, covering her shoulders in a seductive way. Her smile, just like her bright blue eyes, was dazzling.

"Hi there…I'm Mary Slew."

* * *

Okay, let's see how many people want me to continue this odd idea XD


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks to 00jade, Marissa, and TheEntertainer26 for reviewing! I feel happy that I got 3 for the prologue lol. I thought about the idea and here it is: Mary Slew befriends Darren and Steve, getting both to fight over her. When they go to the Cirque du Freak, she spies with Darren…and falls off like an idiot, getting caught. Later, she and Darren become half vampire assistants. Basically she goes through the series we know and love and screws everything up when she tries to fix it.**

* * *

"Mary…Slew?" Darren repeated as he stood up, trying in vain to get the grass stains off his pants.

Steve snickered at first but immediately stopped when he saw her eyes. They were once a light blue similar to the sunny sky…now they were as red as blood. He took half a step back, unsure of what to do now.

"Yes, that is my name." She replied, crossing her tan arms under her large breasts. She glared down at Steve, her eyes somewhat of a wild greenish crimson. "Do you have a problem with it?"

"Of course not!" The boy looked away, hesitate in what else to do or say. Clearing his throat, he held out his hand, "I'm Steve Leonard but most call me Steve Leopard. That's Darren Shan."

A huge smile came across her face, her voice sounding seductive again, "Good to meet both of you." Her perfect teeth glittered in the sun. "Darren Shan…sounds familiar. It sounds like an author or a book I read once. Huh…I don't remember."

Steve whispered to his friend as she stared up at the sky, her eyes an ocean like blue as she grew lost in thought, "She can read?"

"Oh well. Anyway, I'm new here, obviously. What are you guys doing after school?" She placed her hands behind her back, going back and forth on her feet.

Before either could reply, a boy around the same age sprinted towards them. He was waving his arms like a crazy madman, shouting something, "I got something! I found something interesting! Look! Look!"

Alan was his name and he almost stumbled to meet up with them. "I found…oh…hello." His eyes, just like Steve's and Darren's had, landed on her perky breasts. "Uh…um…"

"What did you find?" Darren snarled, feeling jealousy sting at him.

"Oh! Right!" Alan shook his head, looking over at them and pulling something out. "Look!"

Before anyone could look at the piece of paper, Mary snatched it out of his hands. Her green eyes skimmed over it, a huge grin on her face. Clearing her throat, she spoke the title in perfect French without hesitation, "_Cirque du Freak. Come see the amazing and frightening acts of Alexander Ribs, Rhamus Twobellies, Larten Crepsley and Madame Octa, snake boy, Wolf Man, and the Twisting Twins! Tickets are…"_

A bell rang. They all looked up. "That was some pretty good French…" Steve muttered as they started to walk to class. Mary only blushed, giggling so sweet that someone might have gotten diabetes.

When they entered the classroom, the teacher smirked, "Pop quiz! This quiz is all about algebra! We have not covered it for its four grade levels ahead… however; I think you could at least understand one or two problems."

An hour passed.

"Well, well, well…Ms. Slew, have you done this kind of work before?" The teacher looked up from grading the papers.

Mary blushed, "No sir. I just…grasp things easily."

"Well congratulations! She is the only one in our class to get 100!" He exclaimed, smiling.

Once he was distracted by the poor grades, she leaned forward to Darren and Steve, "Hey…want to buy those tickets?"

* * *

Next chapter: Tickets and the show!


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the reviews everyone! I decided to add angst into her to make her more of a Mary Sue XD**

* * *

When they got out of that class, Steve and Darren glanced at each other. They were obviously feeling some sort of jealousy, perhaps even rivalry, between them but neither would admit it. It was all because of Mary Slew.

"So are we going to buy them? The tickets, I mean." Mary had jogged over to them and jumped to land, sticking it. They turned to face her and saw her bouncing, her fluffy hair floating in the air for a moment.

Dazed, they stared for a moment. With the way the sun sparkled, brightening her perfectly white teeth and green eyes, she looked stunning. "Uh…oh, yeah, but we don't have any money." Darren was the first one to speak up.  
Mary giggled softly. "No worries, my parents always have a load of cash hidden in the house. Come on!" As she passed them, she grabbed their wrists and basically dragged them as she skipped. She was humming some sort of song, perhaps a lullaby.

They traveled for half an hour but to the boys, it seemed like only a few minutes. When they stopped and looked, really looked, around the neighborhood, they grimaced. "What side of town are we in?" Steve questioned, glancing at a tire on fire near by.

Mary smiled weakly, "The South side." She walked through a broken gate and into her home. "Hold on for a moment, I'll come out in just a sec."

As soon as she was gone, Darren muttered, "You'd never expect her to live here!"

"Yeah…I wonder if her parents…" Steve's eyes had narrowed but his sentence was interrupted when a shrill voice screamed something.

Instantly, Mary sprinted out of the house with a look of terror in her gray eyes. Her hair became tangled because of the wind and her beautiful skin turned like a milky paste color. Glancing behind her, she wore a shaky smile, "Okay, let's go!"

Darren and Steve shared a look of confusion and just as one of them were about to speak up…Mary tripped over a pebble. She slammed into the sidewalk, giggling softly. When she was helped up, she handed them the money, "Here, hold onto this. With my luck lately, I'll drop it somewhere."

As they walked again, Steve's eyes widened. "What…what is that white powder?!" He touched said powder on the twenty dollar bill, holding it up to Mary. She bit her thick lips, unsure at first of what to say.

"…My parents are drug dealers…" She whispered softly, "…Just don't tell anyone; please…"

Before either could answer, they saw a man before them. He looked scary, like a performer from the… "Cirque Du Freak!" Mary whispered, recognizing him instantly. In perfect French, she asked about the tickets.

Once more French was exchanged, Darren asked, "Well?"

She scrunched her nose, obviously annoyed. Her eyes were a dark pink, almost red. "He said he'll give us three tickets…if we pay double."

Steve smirked, "Let me run home and get the money and it's a done deal."

* * *

Next chapter: The show. Okay people, honestly, I'm losing interest in this story because it's like…I'm forcing myself to right it, ya know? Anyway, just warning you.


End file.
